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A mother and child psychologist shared the 5 essential memories that children carry throughout their lives, and it’s truly remarkable.
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Parents who are concerned with creating special moments with their children and building memories that they can carry through their lives may be surprised by what Carol Kim, a mother of three and family therapist, shared on her Instagram page.
First and foremost, we must remember that children often think and feel very differently from adults, so for them, memories are more connected to feelings than, for example, extravagant vacations or expensive gifts.
According to Kim, the five things that children will remember are directly linked to the presence and support of parents. “Notice how creating good memories doesn’t require expensive toys or luxurious family trips. Your presence is the most valuable gift you can give to your child,” she says in her post.
The first point emphasized by the therapist is the quality time that parents spend with their children. “Setting aside time to focus solely on your child is very special. Playing, reading books, or just talking can create strong and happy memories,” she says.
Another important aspect is the way we talk to children; according to Kim, words of encouragement are essential: “Words of encouragement can impact your child greatly, both in good times and in difficult times. Children often seek approval from their parents, and your positive words can be a strong motivator and a source of comfort… This can help children believe in themselves, giving them the confidence to face new challenges and move forward when things get tough.”
Family traditions are also a significant factor in creating emotional memories: “They create a sense of stability and unity… Family traditions make children feel like they belong and are part of a larger story, deepening their sense of security and understanding of identity and family values.”
For the therapist, adults are the example that children follow, and thus, acts of kindness can be crucial in raising children: “Seeing and doing good things leaves a strong impression on children. It shows them the importance of being kind and considerate. They remember how good it feels to help others and to see their parents helping too.”
The fifth point emphasized by Kim is perhaps the most important; for her, it’s essential that children always feel safe and accepted; for the therapist, comfort in difficult times teaches the value of trust to a child and offers significant benefits in adulthood: “Knowing that they can rely on you in tough times makes them feel safe and builds trust… Comforting them when they are struggling shows that they are loved no matter what happens, and it helps them feel emotionally secure and strong.”
“If you encounter barriers to providing these things, it’s important to reflect on why,” Kim says in her post. “There may be various reasons, such as raising a child alone (we are not meant to be single parents), past traumas, or mental health issues. Recognizing these challenges is the first step in addressing them and finding support.”
This content was created with the assistance of AI.
